Drabbles from me
by Tempermental18
Summary: A series of Drabbles , I guess . I am not that good at summaries .
1. Guardian Angel

**So , this is a disclaimer - 1)- I don't own this**

 **2)- I know it isn't what you expected from the title , but kindly go through this**

 **3)- I have an account on HEX by the name ShaonHarry .**

 **Now, Enjoy!-**

Dean kept his eyes on the road , all but gluing them there , as his mind kept getting back to his thoughts . Now days, this happened almost all the time , his mind kept getting diverted to the 'ifs and buts' in his life .

What if they hadn't been hunters , but been a normal family ? They would have been a happy family of four , leaving normal , healthy lives.

Their Father might have kept his job at the garage , Mom might have been like those typical Mothers , fussing over their children and begging for grand-kids while Sam went to college , getting his Law degree and Dean...

Well that is where his thoughts spent most of his waking hours these days . Himself . What would have his life been like ? He didn't have any idea . He had never really thought about himself , he had never really gotten the time to .

Ever since he had been four , he had learned of the dangers of the world , with the monsters in it and since then , he had only thought about his family and not off himself .

Result was , that he didn't know what he wanted for himself . He felt as if his life wasn't really _his_ , that it belonged to others . That the sole purpose of him living and breathing was to serve the commands and wishes of others , at the cost of _his dreams , his wishes_ .

It hadn't bothered him before but for the past few days , it did . That is why he snapped , he couldn't live with the feeling anymore . It was killing him . Slowly , yes but still killing him . It hurt terribly to feel as if you were nothing else than a slave to others .

Of course , his family didn't do it but it still remained the case . Nothing he would say to himself will change that and most of all , he couldn't even ask for reassurance , for he had to stay as strong as a rock . He was the whole family's pillar of support .

It should have been his father , but alas it was him that Fate had chosen many moons ago and _he_ , Dean Winchester , mere human couldn't do anything about it except live with the burden of it .

He glanced back at the seat beside him , and then at the back and saw his family sleep , not like the normal deep sleep , people were having now , near midnight but still sleep , something that had left him a long while ago , and had left him for good .

He was for watching over them , like a guardian angel , not taking a moment out for himself . Yes, a guarding angel's life wasn't the best , nevertheless what people thought .

"Sleep well guys , your angel is watching over you " he whispered , taking a moment to look at them all , before concentrating on the long , asphalt road and thick darkness in front of him .

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	2. Sleep, the elusive one

_**Hello , I am back with an update! Initially , this had come out as a one-time drabble but now someone, more specifically**_ _ **SSB-CRAZYBUDGIEPOTTERGEAD**_ _ **has convinced me to continue it .It will have psychological stuff and not much action , at least not you like it!**_

 **SSB-CRAZYBUDGIEPOTTERHEAD, This one is for you!**

 **The usual disclaimers apply, and so do some new ones-**

 **1)- This one is short , I had to write it so that it won't keep going round and round in my brain.**

 **2) This isn't directly after the previous one , as the setting has changed quite a little .**

 **3) I know this might seem like a waste of your time , but if you go through this , I'll be very much obliged .**

Dean saw his younger brother fall asleep and for a brief moment , a pang of jealousy shot through him . How was it fair that he could fall asleep this easily ? He couldn't .

He had to work so hard to achieve that feat . He had to lie down , shielding his eyes and trying in vain to tune out the noises that accompanied the dark . Then , he had to clear his mind , force it to forget about the monsters and stuff , which was almost impossible to do , particularly when he had just come home from a hunt . The thoughts kept swimming in his mind , not letting him get any peace and he kept trying to shut them out .

Then , after he had done that too and had finally fallen asleep , he will get up , woken up by a nightmare or in most cases , several of them . He had to stay awake then , all the way until dawn and on most days , they had to go out for a hunt , again .

The conclusion , sleep didn't like him . He , (For Dean was sure that sleep was a he) had long ago decided that a certain Dean Winchester wasn't worthy of a visit and had eluded him .

Sighing , he looked out of the window . The scenery wasn't that good , or maybe it was , Dean couldn't really see through the fog but that didn't matter . It was perfect for the use he was going to put it through , that of something different to look at , other than his family's sleepy form .

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	3. A Horrible Son

**First of all ,I'll like to thank SSB-CRAZYBUDGIEPOTTERHEAD and SmileSimplify for their kind reviews and words of inspiration , this wouldn't have moved forward without that .   
**

**Now-**

 **Disclaimer -The usual ones apply , so I am not going to repeat them .**

 **Happy Reading!**

Dean saw his Brother wake up , move , sigh and then, go right back to sleep . How easy was it for him , to just do that . Trying to keep his mind off that topic and not be envious of his beloved younger sibling , Dean let his mind free of the tight constraints he usually put on them , allowing them to roam free inside his head .

He didn't know why , but his mind settled on reliving the particular night , the one when he had r lost his Mother , the one night that had changed him as his life took an abrupt turn .

He didn't remember much about that night's main occurrences , only bits and pieces but he did remember the things that made him go back to the night . Dean knew that he was a horrible son, for he didn't go back to the events that had taken place later on that night but he couldn't help it .

He went back to relive the day just as how it was for him all those years ago , starting from the moment he had opened his eyes due to the morning sunlight disturbing his sleep , as the curtains weren't pulled over the windows and went on all the way until his Mom had tucked him in with a kiss on his forehead, after his Dad had read him his favorite book .

That had been the last night that had normality in it for him . No other night had been the same , ever since that one , after he had been woken up by the shouts of his Father.

He didn't know who or what it was that had killed his Mom, as it had never again appeared after that night but that didn't mean that he would stop looking for answers , for he never did that . Outside , he showcased his detached self who has got less sentiment than what can be held inside a teaspoon but inside , he was different .

The real Dean cared about stuff and most of all , he wasn't the dim-witted fool his family thought him to be .He wasn't the selfless person either , he was pretty self-conscious ,he just didn't show it .

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	4. Don't Be So Naive , Sammy

**First of all , thank you SSB-CRAZYBUDGIEPOTTERHEAD , ****SmileSimplify,** **and deanpala  for your kind reviews , they make my day! Keep reviewing .**

 **Disclaimer - The usual ones apply as well as a new one - This one is short .** **  
**

 **Now , enjoy!**

Dean sat there in the dingy motel room , with one hand on top of the small table and the other clutching a beer bottle . Sam's earlier words ringing in his had been sitting in the same room , Sam sitting across him while their Dad had been out on a supply run . Sam had suddenly brought up his favorite and Dean's least favorite topic , that of leaving the hunting business.

 _"Dean, why don't we leave all this and settle down ? We don't need to be a part of Dad's madness , do we?" he had asked , out of the blue._

Dean had looked at his brother for a long , long time .He wasn't in a great mood , the hunt had exhausted him so he had replied shortly ." Don't be so naive , Sammy"

That hadn't sat well with Sam and he had left , slamming the door after him , leaving Dean to sit there all alone with only his depressed mind for company.

Dean knew that Sam would be exceptionally happy if they did not hunt anymore . Well , he will be too but that was impossible . Even if they decide to stop, they would not be able to .

Dean had thought about it , a _lot_ . The past few days were spent on this issue and by now , he had gone through all the options , their pros and cons , their possibilities , everything . _Thrice_ . The result , he knew all that was to be known about it . They will never be able to leave this hunting business , **ever again**.

Sure , they will leave it and settle down and everything will be okay for a while and then one day , one day it will all change . They will learn off an incident and discover that nobody in authority will know about how to stop it and they would not be able to live their 'apple-pie' life .

They will gather together , sit in the Impala and run off , determined to fix the problem and save the people . That will be the start . Of course , everyone will agree that it was only an one-time thing , but then they will jump up again when something related to the supernatural happened .

That was how it was going to go , there was no other way . If he had not been back to his 'nurturing sibling and loving son' persona , he would have surely said these things out loud , therefore would have crushed Sam's hope and had turned him into another Dean .. However , he _was_ back to his usual self , so he remained silent , except for the comment on how naive his little brother was .

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